The guilt of feeling depression and anxiety can be a battle in itself. It’s easy to feel like we’ve failed our children in many ways because we ourselves are struggling to stay afloat. I just want you to know that it will be okay, your relationship with your child will continue to change and blossom in new and different ways. You may feel like everything will be the same as today but eventually you will have a six month old baby and then a nine month old baby and even farther out a toddler. Let your relationship be what it is and let God handle the details– He knows what to do even when we don’t.

My relationship with my daughter is so amazing now. As I typed this, she crawled over to me and climbed on my lap and laid her head on me. Her first word was “mama” and she has said it over and over. Looking back on my experiences, I can say with confidence that it brought me to a whole different level of love and happiness with my daughter. Sure, she drives me crazy when she’s teething or fussy for no reason. But the fact that she wants me to hold her is a precious thing to me. My love for her is beyond words!


One thought on “Hope

  1. Tiffany Johns says:

    I have read everything you posted so far and truly you have done a wonderful job. Bravo. I can relate to some of the experiences you descibe and it certainly can feel like a very “alone” time. My kids are 2 and almost 5 and parenting has been an overwhelming experience for me, but I can say that it is refining my walk with the Lord and helping me depend on Him more. It is truly a sanctifying process and I am far from having “arrived,” but I’m grateful, like you said, that He is taking care of the details. Thank you for sharing your experiences. Thank you for being vulnerable. I’m sure the Lord will use your testimony to guide others who may be struggling. Your family is beautiful. Tiffany Johns

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